Time Out
"He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul…" Psalm 23: 2-3
Recently I had to call for a time out on myself. Why? Was it because I was a like a naughty child who needed discipline? Nah, not at all. Literally life felt like it was throwing everything at me, from all angles all at the same time. If it wasn't something at home with family illnesses with my dad or grandad, it was work and the stresses (though that has become a permanent feature), finances or lack thereof, emotional tiredness, physical weakness and I was just about ready to give up. You know when you just want to switch off the world while you just get yourself together and breathe again. I was tired of putting on a fake smile, and pretending all is well, and reading and reposting inspirational quotes. For those who work in jobs where to you get annual leave - there's always the countdown to freedom where you have time to see people, do what you want and just be you for a minute.
I needed more than a minute, so in my 12 days off from work I had my time out (could have done with another week but I'll be grateful for those days). For a couple of days I just did nothing but sleep. I won't even lie to you. I needed the physical rest to then deal with the emotional draining on my life. I contacted my best friend and took myself down to London to do what was needed. To just talk. Now no-one would believe us when we said we never have enough time to talk, but it's been a good while (since Portugal in November) that we had undiluted, uninterrupted time together. It's amazing the power of just talking things through, that in your head going over and over feels like you're going crazy, and no-one can understand you - let alone help you. But literally just talking it all out over good food and no distractions helped me change my perspective on most things and reassure me. Time away from the normal routine, time to just be myself was more valuable than I can actually describe. For me being single, without children and the only responsibility is working and paying the bills on time (thank God for direct debit!) that it is easy for me to just pick a date(s) and just go. But however possible in your life I would strongly encourage you to take this time out and find peace and see the world in a new light.
Time away from people that are just draining you. This could be of your time, energy, money, their ungratefulness of you being there for them, or just a draining person. Don't get me wrong now, there are times when I'm sure I am very draining, especially when I'm in that mood to just moan and woe-is-me about life. But I recognise that and I take myself away for a bit. Some people don't have that ability - or they do and just don’t want to. Take time to learn about yourself away from people, away from the noise. Just take that time to learn what makes you, you. What do you like to do? What can you improve about yourself? What don't you like and want to change? Work on these things and learn to love these things about you. Get the balance right however, because suddenly withdrawing from people (not the draining ones they'll find someone else's energy to sap) - can be worrying and cause them to be more in your space. So to your closet ones just let them know you're having a time out (or whatever you want to call it) and enjoy the process.
I'd also encourage time away from social media. Yes all platforms of social media - unless it is an intricate part of your professional role and you have to be on there - come offline. Earlier in the year I logged off Facebook, Twitter, SnapChat, & Instagram. At first it felt weird not scrolling through and seeing what everyone is up to. But then it became normal and I started to actually hold face-to-face conversations. Madness in this technological, filtered double tap to like world we live in these days. In all honesty I can't even remember why I just decided to come off social media for a while but it was the best decision ever. It gave me time to actually give time to projects I had been neglecting, learn new skills, and improve on the ones I already had. Coming off Facebook - or farsebook as some call it was a real breath of fresh air. Aimlessly scrolling, then *pause oh a funny video*, continue, oh someone baked a cake *click like* scroll - what did it actually benefit for me? I had time to catch up with friends, go out for food (favourite thing to do), concentrate more in the gym instead of posting a picture to prove I actually went -_- (though I do that one recently!) and so much more. When you come back you'll feel less of the need to actually go on it. It's also good for your mental health. Social media puts on this invisible pressure to have the perfect life, perfect body, perfect relationship - with us forgetting this is the highlight reel, the filtered version of what is truly going on with everyone else. For your sake take that time away from it and become happy with where you are, and if you're not - do something about it!
Now this is a huge topic. Mental Health. It's a taboo subject that people seem to be afraid to talk about. That is until someone has a mental crisis/breakdown or talks about it; then all of a sudden you see people coming out from all directions with their stories of how they truly are. Depression, Anxiety, suicidal thoughts, and so much more people are going through and maybe even you are. There is no easy fix, pop a plaster on it and it will be okay overnight. But I can only share what works for me when I go through my dark days and nights
Time Out. Just do it
Log Out. If you forgot your password you can always reset it, it's not that major.
Eat and Drink regularly and wash yourself. Look after yourself physically where you can have a positive effect on your mind.
Cry It Out - this one happen spontaneously for me, I can't control it when something is overwhelming me
Talk It Out. To someone trustworthy, and mature that can guide you through the process
Pray It Out. Now this one isn't easy to do when things aren't great. In fact at times I felt like blaming God for allowing all the bad things in my life to happen the way they have done. Instead, I'm trying to make more of a conscious effort to have an attitude of gratitude. There are so many blessings that I have, that I really need to remind myself to thank God for these before any of my list of complaints.
Taking care of your own Mental Health. It is a huge subject area in itself and that short list in no way has covered or reached the depths of discussion and exploration that it needs, but these I find are good starting points. Just give yourself a moment of quiet daily. Just one moment to really appreciate life and all the reasons why you're alive. Do that over your favourite drink or food, and soon you'll start to see that sun come shining through. Anyways I'm back now coming with more regular posts, especially now this writer's block has been lifted [again]!
Ever Evolving
Empress Nae
May/17